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Conscious Discipline: A Better Way to Parent

November 2, 2010

I went to Orlando a couple of weeks ago for a parenting workshop, and it was awesome! I went with my Mom (Pam), Sister-in-law (Amber) and her Mom (Joan) so that we could try to get on the same page when it came to disciplining our children/grandchildren. This workshop was about conscious discipline.  It helps to teach you how to respond to situations rather than react. When you respond you are aware of what you are doing and have thought about the situation. When you react, there is no thought involved only action. It really makes you look at yourself under the microscope and see what you may look like to your children and how they are taught to react to situations. Many of the things that we freak out about can be avoided or handled in a less dramatic way, if we just respond. We as parents, tend to focus on behavior and not the state of the child. This loving guidance focuses on the state of a child first and corrects the behavior second. Everybody perceives things differently, so each person may have a totally different response to an experience. I never really thought about that before and as a mother I am going to try way harder to try to see both sides of a situation and respond rather than react. I am currently reading a book by Dr. Becky Bailey called “Easy to Love difficult to Discipline”. She is the person who came up with the conscious discipline techniques and she really puts things in perspective. Many parents do not allow their children to feel their emotions. We as a society think that if our child is sad we need to make them happy. This form of  “happy-ing up” our children does not allow them to feel emotion and may cause they to cope in other ways. For example, let say every time Sally is sad about something her mother buys her toy to make her “happy” again. What is Sally going to do when she is sad as an adult? She is going to run up that credit card bill trying to make herself  “happy”. Life is full of all kinds of emotion and unfortunately sadness is one of them, so let your child feel it so they can learn to live with it as adults!

I just find anything on parenting so interesting. I’m hoping by learning as much as I can about development and parenting, I will be able to shape my children into well-rounded adults!

I will post more on my efforts to add the conscious discipline techniques to our parenting style as life goes on! If anyone would like to read more about it please visit their website at www.ConsciousDiscipline.com

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Pam Drake permalink
    November 3, 2010 12:45 am

    Goood for you!! I loved the post!!!

  2. November 3, 2010 2:12 am

    Kim, this sounds very similar to a book I’ve been reading called Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen. He talks a lot about letting kids fully experience their emotions instead of hushing them up. And about not letting our emotions get in the way of responding to situations, and basically just getting behind the eyes of the child to help understand what’s going on.

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